In order to be the voice of your business and truly show up consistently and make the impact you are here to make, you need to have confidence.
Confidence in yourself and confidence in your message.
Confidence is one of those funny things that we all have bucket loads of as tiny children, but slowly and surely things happen that knock that confidence out of us. But it never completely disappears.
No matter what your inner critic tries to tell you, you have confidence within you and you are worthy of reclaiming it and shining.
The key thing to remember is that it is not about silencing or shunning the inner critic and hoping that the goddess takes her place. It is about accepting that both the sabotaging and warrior energies exist in you at the same time. It is about acknowledging the inner critic, thanking her for insight, accepting that she will always be a part of you and taking action to make sure the goddess simply has more airtime.
So how can you call on that goddess energy and reclaim your confidence? Here are four easy ways:
- Celebration; and
- Fake it.
Your memories and emotions are contained in the exact same part of your brain – they are anchored to each other. Which is why every time you call on a memory, through any of your senses, the anchored emotions come back to you. Taste, sounds, touch, and smell can all be used to call forth a memory and its anchored emotion, but the easiest one to control is sight. When you close down your eyes and visualise a time when you felt most confident, that emotion comes back to you. The clearer you can visualise it, the stronger the emotion. When you open your eyes, that emotion does not disappear – it is yours, your goddess energy to go forth and use. Simple.
Another beautiful thing about the brain, is that it cannot separate imagined from reality. So if you can imagine it in enough detail, visualise it with all your might, then your brain believes it to be so. If it has already happened once, then you can be confident that you can do it again. So if your inner critic is dragging you down about that piece of content you are writing, the launch that you are about to release, or that workshop that you are trialling for the very first time. Then close your eyes, and visualise yourself having just confidently published, launched, or delivered your thing and it was a huge success. Make sure you see every detail: who you helped; what impact you had; how you are celebrating; who you are telling; how you are feeling; and where in your body you are feeling it. Really sit with in and let it sink in. Now it is done; if you can do it once then you can do it again.
Want to know something else pretty cool about your brain? It always likes to be right. It will filter your memories to find all of the evidence to support your latest theory. It distorts and deletes everything else.
So when your inner critic is always telling you that you are not good enough then that is the evidence your brain provides to you in memoires. Every time you have been confident or successful or shown you ARE good enough conveniently gets pushed aside or distorted to prove her right. The trick is, to change your story so your brain can then find all the evidence to prove that right.
But switching from the inner critic to the goddess can be difficult at times. Especially because most of this is happening in our sub-conscious mind. Without knowing the exact story you are telling yourself, it can be hard to change.
One of the best ways I have found to uncover those stories is to journal about it. When the part of your brain that over thinks and over analyses is pre-occupied with the act of writing, your sub-conscious brain is free to intuit and feel. Allowing the words to fall onto the page that we may not have realised where there. Once you have uncovered what stories your inner critic is telling yourself, you can work on changing her energy to the goddess energy and reclaim your confidence.
Journaling can also be an amazing way for you to remind yourself that you are awesome, to evoke the goddess within. Try writing a list of all of the things that you love about yourself, or all of the things you have achieved, all of the people you have helped, or all the impacts you have had. The ideas are limitless, pick an area you are struggling with and go firth and journal.
Spending time journaling also allows you to then read back over your work from time to time and have those FIGJAM moments which can really be an amazing way to reclaim your confidence.
When you allow your inner critic to focus on all of the things you have done wrong then you are asking for more of that from the universe. Where your focus goes your energy flows…. If you instead allow your goddess energy to come forth by turning your focus to celebrating all of your wins, even the tiny ones like getting out of bed in the morning, then you call forth more things to celebrate. With success comes confidence. With confidence comes more success and on goes the perpetual cycle.
If you honestly feel like you have nothing to celebrate, then take action. Do something small that you can celebrate, something fun, something that you love to do that comes easy to you and once you have evoked the goddess through play, she will stay with you for inspired action.
As I mentioned before your brain cannot distinguish between imagined and real. So fake your confidence and it will appear.
The easiest way to fake it, to tell your brain – I AM CONFIDENT, is to hold your body in a confident stance – a power pose. Holding a power pose for 2 minutes has been scientifically proven to boost your confidence. It makes you more likely to take risks and makes you more willing to make difficult decisions. So strike a pose and then go and publish, launch or deliver your thing. It will feel silly for a little while, but that is just your inner critic trying to keep her dominant position. So watch your thoughts closely and shake them off. Once the goddess takes over, it won’t matter that it feels silly, you will hold it anyway because you know you are worth feeling a little silly for a big gain.
Boosting your confidence is that easy. The more you do any of these practices, the easier it will become to reclaim your confidence again and again.
If you would any like any further guidance on the above practices or to dig deeper in finding your goddess within then book in a free virtual cuppa.